How do you organize a space party?

You planet!

Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

Because they're cheaper than day rates!

What do you call two birds in love?

Tweet-hearts!

Why did the physics teacher break up with the biology teacher?

There was no chemistry!

What did one ion say to another?

I've got my ion you!

Why did the bacteria break up?

It was time to split!

How does a physicist plant flowers?

With quantum soil—they'll be blooming in multiple universes!

Why are chemists excellent at solving problems?

They have all the solutions!

Did you hear about the mathematician who's afraid of negative numbers?

He'll stop at nothing to avoid them!